Not Even a Hint – GIVEAWAY!

mm1This month’s giveaway is featured at the bottom of this article. Keep reading for details.

As we strive to reach the potential God has planned for us, let’s not forget about one very important aspect––that of sexual integrity.

How much impurity can we allow into our lives before it becomes a problem? According to God, none (1 Thessalonians 4:3-4). There’s no amount of lust or sexual impurity that is appropriate or pleasing to God, and author Joshua Harris goes into the hows and whys of the sinfulness of impurity, as well as reminding us of a better way to live.

Not Even a Hint is an easy-to-understand, 175-page book crammed full of information about lust and sexual purity. This book is written for anyone who desires to be completely pure, but struggles, whether male or female, married or single. He tells us that we can’t win the battle of sexual integrity on our own, but must rely on God to help us. The sections and chapters are well organized and written in an easy-to-read format.

Part One: The Truth About Lust
1. Not even a hint: Why can’t I seem to beat lust?
2. What God Called Good: Is it biology or is it sin?
3. You can’t save yourself: Where can I find the power to change?

Part Two: In the Thick of the Battle
4. A custom-tailored plan: Where am I weakest and what can I do?
5. Guys and girls: How are we different and how can we help each other?
6. Self-centered sex: How do I deal with masturbation?
7. Half a poison pill won’t kill you: How do I cope with the temptations of media?

Part Three: Strategies for Long-Term Change
8. Lone rangers are dead rangers: Why is accountability so important?
9. The sword of the spirit: Can the truth help me defeat the lies?
10. Holiness is a harvest: How can I sow the Spirit?

mm3Joshua Harris doesn’t allow room for excuses in his book––sin is sin, and lust, in any form, is still lust. He talks about impurity issues that guys and girls deal with, and he doesn’t give an easy out––as one doesn’t exist––but he does give practical suggestions about how to overcome all forms of lust. Not Even a Hint also discusses God’s plan for sex, and we’re told what lust isn’t.

We’re encouraged to look to God and to examine ourselves––Harris knows, and explains, that all purity begins with the core of our being––our heart (Proverbs 4:23). To truly be pure, and to fully live up to God’s potential for us, we must guard our hearts so we can live a life free from the entanglement and heartache of sin.

Giveaway

We are giving away one copy of Not Even a Hint to a reader! To enter, leave a comment below by Sunday, March 29, 2009, stating at least one thing you’d like to see reviewed in an upcoming Media Matters article. You may enter to win this book for yourself, or to give it away as a gift for someone else.

Comments are moderated, so they may take a day or so to appear. Make sure to include a valid e-mail address in your information (this will not appear in the post). The winner will be announced on March 31 and will be e-mailed with simple instructions on how to claim this prize.

By Davonne Parks

Abortion Part III: How does abortion affect me spiritually?

ultrasound1So far we have covered the medical and legal ramifications of abortion. Now it is time for the most important part of the discussion: what does the Bible say about abortion?

Life in the womb

The main issue that needs addressed is whether or not the life that was conceived is a living human person. God created everything, contained in three classes of life; plants, animals and people; under which category could this conceived life be classified? Plants, animals, and people all reproduce after their own kind. Since the life inside of a human womb is not a plant or animal, it obviously must be human. Most versions of the Bible do not mention the words “human” or “human being” in referencing anyone. Instead it uses “man,” “woman,” “child,” “son,” “daughter,” “baby,” and “infant.” This means the Bible refers to the unborn baby with terms that imply it is human, just as it does for other humans. (Visit The Bible and Abortions for more information.)

Genesis 25:22 speaks of Rebekah when she was carrying twins and states that the “children struggled within her.” Luke 1:41 tells of the babe in Elisabeth’s womb leaping at the sound of Mary’s voice. Luke 1:36 tells us that Elisabeth conceived a son. In Psalm 139:13-17, David praises God for forming him in his mothers womb. All of these verses talk about children who are in the womb and it speaks of them as living. So if something is living, what gives us the right to kill it? Even if the baby is living because of a sin committed by the mother or is simply an unplanned pregnancy, what right do we have to take the life of another living being? The simple answer is none. Matthew 19:18: “Jesus said, Thou shall do no murder…”

Post-abortion

So, what about someone who had an abortion and now realizes it was wrong? You can still be forgiven. God offers forgiveness for any sin through His son when we come to Him and repent. Rom. 1:16; 6:3, 4; 10:9, 10; Mark 16:16; Acts 17:30; 2:38; 22:16. Even after you have asked for forgiveness, you may still have feelings of guilt. Although I have never had an abortion, there are many girls and women who have had one and then realize how wrong their decision was. There are young women who know it is wrong but have one because they feel pressured into having it or simply go ahead with it because they don’t want to admit their sin.

laborThere are millions of personal testimonies online written by women who have had an abortion, including one by the author Vicki Courtney. Guilt, regret and self destruction seem to be the aftermath of abortion in almost all of their stories. And most admit that until they accepted God and repented for their past, they were not able to let go of their decision.

Unplanned pregnancy

If you or a friend is struggling with an unplanned pregnancy, I encourage you to talk to a counselor and sooner rather than later, your parents. If you need more help deciding what to do, there are life-choosing options. Heartbeat International is a pro-life Christian pregnancy center and they can help with your situation. If you would like to call them, you can do so at 1-800-395-HELP. They are non-judgmental and offer a variety of services. By using their website or calling, you can find a center that is close to you.

There are many agencies out there that would be able to help and give you the guidance that you need. But no matter what guidance is given, none is as great as God’s love and commands for us, including His command to care for His children (Matthew 18:5).

By Sarah J. Ancheta

Living a life of potential

h2h2Webster defines potential as “the inherent ability or capacity for growth, development, or coming into being.” Jeremiah 29:11 describes it this way: “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

As a young woman, you no doubt have had many people list your qualities and the potential for your life. The possibilities are truly endless, they might say. When I was a young woman, my parents affirmed that I could be anything that I wanted to be. They encouraged me to try many things, keep an open mind, and have a prayerful heart. For as long as I can remember, though, I have longed to be a wife and a mother. I had no desire to achieve accolades as a great career woman; no longing filled my heart for a prestigious college degree. In my mind’s eye my potential was for homemaking: my talents, my qualities, my aspirations all for this goal. At 21, I found my first dream realized when I married my husband. We have a wonderful marriage, and I am truly blessed. The years began to pass without my second dream fulfilled. No children surrounded me, calling me Momma. I had no one to nurture. In my despair, I was angry with God. How could He allow me this pain? How could He prevent me from living up to what I saw as my true potential? I had so much love to share, so many things to teach my child about God, such a desire to hold my precious children. Perhaps God didn’t have a plan for my life after all. Maybe I was wrong all along in thinking that motherhood was what I was created for. I began to question my very existence and everything I had ever believed.

Through a series of events, God called me back to Him—called me back to the place where His plans for my life could be realized. It was only when I truly surrendered myself to His call, letting go of my grief, placing my life in His hands that I discovered God’s marvelous plan for me. He had been shaping me, preparing me for the work that He had for me to accomplish.

h2h1He had indeed given me great potential. I just needed to allow Him to help me reach it. I had to release my control over my life and take a leap of faith. I had to say, “Yes, God, I will follow your plan for my life, regardless of where it leads me.” I had to be willing to let go of my dreams, of what I had determined my potential was, and allow God to fulfill the plan He had for me.

Now, I have someone to call me Momma. My precious son, whom I love more than life, was born 8000 miles away in India to another mother. He was born in a land I knew nothing about, in a culture that I am still discovering. Yet God had brought us together through the miracle of adoption. He has given me a greater responsibility than just motherhood. He has asked me to care for and raise a child that wasn’t born to me—a child with special needs, a child of a different race and different background. God asked me to give up my longing for a child who resembled my husband, to parent a child who would never be confused as “my own.”

The result of my leap of faith has been joy beyond measure. My son is the light of my life. Home with us now for two years, he is our delight. Parenting him, teaching him about the love of God, beginning to tell him of the plans that God has for him, has fulfilled me in ways I never thought possible. My heart overflows so much that I want to tell the world how adoption has changed our lives. I feel compelled to share with others the plight of the orphan. I want to not only parent this precious child but to tell the world about others like him. I am a mouthpiece. It is my responsibility to show the world that God is the Father of the Fatherless. Showing how He brought a woman desperate for a child to call her own and a small, lonely child together from across the world to become a family—not for my own praise, but to the praise of our Loving Heavenly Father.

h2h3As I look back over my life, I can see God’s hand in shaping me for adoptive motherhood. I see how He created me for this. How different my life would be had I not listened and allowed God to help me reach my potential—His potential for my life. What joy I would be missing had I stubbornly clung to the dreams and aspirations I had for myself. I would never know the deep satisfaction I have every night holding my precious son as he prepares for bed.

This is my story, but there are countless others. In the Bible, Esther never aspired to be queen, yet God saw her true potential. David, being the youngest and a shepherd, had no idea he would one day be a great king of Israel. It never entered his mind that some day, the Messiah would be born from his descendants.

Like these, God is creating in you the ability, the desire, and the passion for His plans. Psalm 139 tells us that God created us—formed us in our mother’s womb. He has fashioned you for a purpose. Will you live up to His potential for you? In the short term, you may grieve something you think you may have lost; but in the end, you will rejoice in the deep satisfaction of knowing that you have lived up to the great potential that God has planned for your life.

By Pam DeArmon

My Child, Do You Remember Me?

Gifted Girls is featuring poetry this month, and new poems will appear throughout the week. To join in on next month’s theme, send a photo of something you’ve sewn, such as clothing, accessories, blankets, pillows, etc. Please submit photos by Sunday, March 29, 2009.

My Child, Do You Remember Me?

My child, do you remember me?
We met so long ago.
You were formed inside my womb,
yet never allowed to grow.

gg5I never got to see your face,
or hold you in my arms.
I pray someday you’ll understand–
I never meant you harm.

I missed playing peek-a-boo
and going to the park.
I missed holding you in my lap
when you were afraid of the dark.

I missed your pretty pictures
of rainbows in the sky.
I missed the cards on Mother’s Day-
the kind that make you cry.

I missed you learning to ride a bike
and your first dive into the pool.
I missed your every summertime
and your every first day of school.

I missed your every birthday
and watching you grow each year.
I missed saying “I love you”
and showing how much I care.

My child, will you forgive me
for the life I stole from you?
Will you know the tears I’ve shed
for that child I never knew?

I know you’re in a better place,
and someday, I’ll meet you there.
For Jesus has forgiven me,
my sin, I no longer bear.

My child, will you remember me
on that day we meet again?
Will you even know my face
or wonder where I’ve been?

“Yes Mother, I remember you;
we met so long ago.
Why I could not stay with you,
I really do not know.”

“Come with me and meet the Lord,”
my child will smile and say.
“I’ll take your hand and lead you there,
for He’ll wash your tears away.”

Finally, I’ll approach His throne,
my sins as white as snow,
and He’ll hold me tight and say to me,
“My child, welcome home.”

Vicki Courtney ©1995

My Spineless Power

Gifted Girls is featuring poetry this month, and new poems will appear throughout the week. To join in on next month’s theme, send a photo of something you’ve sewn, such as clothing, accessories, blankets, pillows, etc. Please submit photos by Sunday, March 29, 2009.

My Spineless Power

gg4Sometimes I’m honest, but I usually taint my words with lies
At some point, every person has been affected by me
I will make you doubt the character of innocent people
And I will make others doubt the character of you

I am often colored with the green of envy
And I usually thrive on creating drama
I refuse to look into the heart of a person
But, instead, I strive to find their faults

Some people believe me, but nobody trusts me
Even though I act tough, in reality, I am spineless
Because of this, I will try to break up relationships
And tear down friendships, all in a single day

I don’t care about age or nationality
Gender and financial status mean nothing to me
I seek to devour everything in my path
I long to destroy the spirits of those nearby

If you allow me,
I will someday destroy your spirit, too
It’s up to you to learn to rise above.
I am Gossip

By Davonne Parks

His Plan

Gifted Girls is featuring poetry this month (today’s poem was written by a Gifted Guy), and new poems will appear throughout the week. To join in on next month’s theme, send a photo of something you’ve sewn, such as clothing, accessories, blankets, pillows, etc. Please submit photos by Sunday, March 29, 2009.

His Plan
gg3Psalm 139:13-18a (NASB)

For You formed my inward parts;
You wove me in my mother’s womb.

I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;

Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;
And in our book were all written
The days that were ordained for me,
When as yet there was not one of them.

How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand

– King David

Blue-Eyed Girl

Gifted Girls is featuring poetry this month, and new poems will appear throughout the week. To join in on next month’s theme, send a photo of something you’ve sewn, such as clothing, accessories, blankets, pillows, etc. Please submit photos by Sunday, March 29, 2009.

Blue-Eyed Girl

gg1A million tears run down her face
with all the fears that have yet to fade.
She wanted him to know
but she hasn’t yet to show.

Sitting in the sun, blue eyes crying.
Trying so hard to fake all her smiles.
She finally breaks down,
can’t move, all frowns.

Crying her heart out,
she has no where to turn.
With no one there to help her,
no one to care.

People walking by
looking her into the eyes.
Stopping, staring,
they don’t know what she has to hide.

Morning to night,
she puts up the fight to be strong.
Trying to move along with life
but it seems so hard.

Finding a new faith in God,
from day to night she prays.
She holds her head up high, thinking of the hope she has,
knowing something better will come her way.

The days go by and all the tears are gone.
She looks up into the sky thanking Him for all that He has done.
New tears of freedom and happiness run down her face, all the pain is gone.
All things happen in His time.

By Michelle Jane

I owe it all to Him

Gifted Girls is featuring poetry this month, and new poems will appear throughout the week. To join in on next month’s theme, send a photo of something you’ve sewn, such as clothing, accessories, blankets, pillows, etc. Please submit photos by Sunday, March 29, 2009.

I owe it all to Him

giftedgirl1The One who gave it all for me,
So I could have a hope;
Forgave my sins and set me free-
The Anchor on my rope.

The only One who keeps me sane
When I don’t know what to do;
He can always ease the pain,
He helps me see the truth.

I often fail and wonder how
He still loves me so;
Inside, He sees that I mean well;
He sees my heart, I know.

Sometimes it seems my weaknesses
Throw failure in my face.
But deep inside, my Rock, my Strength,
reassures me of His grace.

It hurts to admit, after all He’s done,
That I could do so much more.
Dear God, I ask You, open my eyes;
Help me see those doors.

A stranger, a friend –anyone–
I know they aren’t just people;
Someone must tell them of God;
If I don’t try, who’ll teach them?

It feels like I’m against myself;
I know what I should do.
But still my fears would hold me back,
I don’t have the strength, it’s true.

But I will never cease to pray,
He’ll pull me ever through.
He’s paid the price; I’m here to serve;
Jesus, I owe it all to You.

By Hannah Smith

What defines a Friend?

friends1Since this month’s theme is “Pierce my heart to live up to Your potential for me,” I thought it’d be appropriate to discuss the key qualities found in good friendships. While reading, honestly think about whether or not you are living up to what God wants you to be to your friends. We’re told in John 15:13 that, “No one has greater love than to lay down his life for his friends.” It can be difficult to imagine loving our friends enough to willingly die for them, and yet that’s the greatest love a friend can have! While it may be nice to have many friends, we also need to be discerning in choosing friends who share, or at least respect, our love and obedience for God. These are the friends who will encourage us in our walk with Him and who we can share conversation with about Him.

Other qualities of a true friend

A good friend is positive. Let me ask you something. When looking for a friend do you look for someone you can laugh with, have fun with, and enjoy being with? Or is it someone you can look up to and gain guidance, trust, encouragement and support from? More importantly, what kind of friend are you? Are you a friend who is trustworthy, kind, and encouraging? In order to have a good friend, we must first be a good friend, with a positive attitude.

A true friend is comforting in time of need. When friends cry, it’s good for you to be there to comfort them, whether it’s over a breakup, a family problem, or the loss of a loved one. Solid friendships are comforting, and can help us make it through difficult times. The biggest thing we can do to help may be to simply offer a shoulder to cry on. Second Corinthians 1:3-4 says, “blessed be the…God of all comfort, who comforts us.” Being there for a friend through thick and thin allows you to get closer to them, open up to them and help them to know they can open up to you.. Remember that sometimes even small gestures can have a great impact on someone’s life.

A friend is trustworthy. Trust is one of the most important qualities in a good friend. If there’s no trust, there’s no real friendship. If we feel that a friend is not trustworthy, they’re not the person we’ll go to when we really need someone there for us. True friends are the ones who offer the truth even if it’s difficult. Are you free to trust each other?

friends2A good friend is understanding. Good friends will have empathy for you, but they will not go as far as to pity you. They try their best in understanding what you’re going through and how you feel about it, while also trying to find the best way to help. Galatians 6:2 tells us to share each other’s trouble and problems, but we need to be careful that in sharing our problems, we’re not taking part in self pity or gossip. Do you empathize with your friends, and fully listen to them as they talk through their issues?

Be a friend

Allow God to work in your life, and ask Him to lead you to good friends, if He hasn’t already. Be patient, because His timing is best. When a potential friend crosses your path, allow them to see Christ in you, and live up to the full potential He has planned for you by being the best Christian example and friend you can.

Michelle Jane

Abortion Part II: How did abortion become legal?

eightweeksafterconception1All photos in this article were taken eight weeks after conception, when the baby was just over one inch long. Abortion Part 1 can be read here.

Most of you have heard of the Supreme Court case called Roe v. Wade which legalized abortion. But until recently I never really understood what the case was really all about and how this decision could be made which allowed women to abort a pregnancy.

In this case, a woman (named Norma McCorvey, who chose to be called Jane Roe) sued the state of Texas represented by the district attorney of Dallas County, Henry Wade. The Texas law at the time only allowed abortion as a life-saving procedure on behalf of the mother. Many states had similar laws or banned abortion all together. Ms. Roe stated she had been raped and did not wish to continue the pregnancy, and that her lack of freedom to get an abortion infringed on her right to privacy.

Roe v. Wade is not the only case to shape the abortion debate, however. There was a Georgia case called Doe v. Bolten which “involved a married woman who was also denied an abortion for not meeting the necessary state requirements” (Georgia law allowed for abortion if the life or health of the mother was threatened, if the baby was seriously deformed, or if the pregnancy was a result of rape). A three-judge District Court ruled that Roe did have basis to sue, and declared Texas abortion law void for being “vague” and “overbroad.” The District Court ruling in the Doe case was split. It ruled that there were some unnecessary bureaucratic burdens that might hinder someone from receiving a due abortion, but they still held that the State had a right to restrict abortion according to the principles already in place. Both decisions were appealed, both decisions ended up before the Supreme Court, and both verdicts were handed down on the same day, January 22, 1973.

Legal verdict

Roe ruled (7-2) that though states did have an interest in protecting fetal life, such interest was not “compelling” until the fetus was viable, or able to live on his or her own (placing viability at the start of the third trimester). Thus, all state abortion laws that forbade abortion during the first six months of pregnancy were thereby invalidated. Third trimester abortions, on the other hand, were only legal if the pregnancy threatened the life or health of the mother. The Doe verdict, however, defined “health of the mother” in such broad terms, that any prohibitions to 3rd trimester abortions were essentially eliminated. According to Justice Harry Blackmun’s majority opinion, a woman’s health includes her “physical, emotional, psychological, (and) familial” well-being, and should include considerations about the woman’s age. “All these factors may relate to health,” Blackmun argued, so as to give “the attending physician the room he needs to make his best medical judgment.” In other words, if a woman is upset about her 3rd trimester pregnancy (psychological health), her doctor has the necessary legal basis to abort.” (For more information, visit Abort73.com.)

A change of heart

eightweeksafterconception2Norma McCorvey, the woman who originally pushed for the legalization of abortion, announced on August 10, 1995 that she had become an advocate of the pro-life movement. She wrote in her book, Won By Love, “I was sitting in O.R.’s offices when I noticed a fetal development poster. The progression was so obvious, the eyes were so sweet. It hurt my heart, just looking at them. I ran outside and finally, it dawned on me. ‘Norma,’ I said to myself, ‘They’re right.’ I had worked with pregnant women for years. I had been through three pregnancies and deliveries myself. I should have known. Yet something in that poster made me lose my breath. I kept seeing the picture of that tiny, 10-week-old embryo, and I said to myself, That’s a baby! It’s as if blinders just fell off my eyes and I suddenly understood the truth–that’s a baby! I felt ‘crushed’ under the truth of this realization. I had to face up to the awful reality. Abortion wasn’t about ‘products of conception.’ It wasn’t about ‘missed periods.’ It was about children being killed in their mother’s wombs. All those years I was wrong. Signing that affidavit, I was wrong. Working in an abortion clinic, I was wrong. No more of this first trimester, second trimester, third trimester stuff. Abortion–at any point–was wrong. It was so clear. Painfully clear.”

McCorvey herself had never had an abortion because the courts took longer than her nine-month pregnancy to rule. She gave birth to a baby girl during that time and placed her up for adoption. In 2005, McCorvey petitioned the Supreme Court to overturn the 1973 decision, stating that the case should be heard again due to evidence that the procedure may harm women, but this petition was denied. (To read more about the specifics of this case, you can visit the Wikipedia article about Norma McCorvey.)

Norma McCorvey, or Jane Roe, changed her mind, and her heart. She knew what she had done was sinful, but it was too late to go back. She couldn’t give life back to the babies she’d assisted in murdering, and she couldn’t erase the law she’d helped to put in place. It’s too late for those babies to have a chance at life, but it doesn’t have to be too late for others.

God’s verdict

eightweeksafterconception3Just because something is legal does not always mean it is ethical. There are many laws that as Christians we may not agree with (i.e. legalization of alcohol, cigarettes, federally funded planned parenthood, gay marriage, etc.). So, many people may ask why abortion is such a big issue when there are many things we don’t agree with. Abortion does not involve just one person. There is an innocent life that, whether or not it can survive outside the mother, is a life all the same—one that God created and has a plan for. Psalm 139:13: “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” The legalization of abortion also affects not just adults, but teens. It also affects women in many different situations: married women who don’t want more children, unwed women, and victims of sexual crimes. Legally, these people have rights to privacy. Of course privacy is an important right. However, ethically we have an obligation in our obedience to God to protect life.

There are always ongoing legal cases regarding abortion and there always will be as long as there is more than one point of view. As Christians we must remember that just because something may be legal or acceptable in the world, does not make it acceptable or right in the eyes of God. We must be obedient to do what He views as right.

By Sarah J. Ancheta