Proverbs 3:24b “When you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.”

Some of us may sleep in baggy pants and t-shirts every night, but we can get cute and modest pajama’s for a reasonable price.

Gap has great pajama pants – check in stores to find better deals on their clearance racks. Old Navy has a ton of cute pajama sets for reasonable prices. (The immodest are mixed in with the modest on their website, so shop with caution.) Fashion Bug has pants for $12 that can be combined with a solid color tee. You can get an entire pajama set (capris and a matching t-shirt) for $18.99 including shipping at crazyforbargains.com. Pajamas are a great thing to buy at places like Value City or TJ Maxx, so check discount shops in your area for even better deals.

If you’ve been reading this column, you know the modesty rules: Nothing spaghetti strap, nothing midriff or cleavage showing, and shorts need to be close to knee length. It’s important to be careful to dress modestly at all times, even when the clothes are just intended for sleepwear. Visit our modesty section for more guidelines, and to read verses from God’s Word regarding modesty.

Whether you’re going away to college, or will be living with your parents this fall, have fun accomplishing your late-night study sessions in style!

By Davonne Parks

This month’s giveaway, with a value of up to $75, and an additional special offer, will be featured in tomorrows article, so stay tuned!

Last month, we discussed the importance of modest clothing, no matter what the occasion. We’ve also previously discussed modest bathing suits and the topic of mixed swimming. If you haven’t read those articles yet, please take a look, then come back to read the rest of this article!

The definition

While many females try to rationalize why they think it’s okay to wear bikinis in the summer, it’s important to take a true look at what God thinks about the issue. 1 Timothy 2:9: “Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly…” That verse may not sound like much yet, but it’s more loaded than you probably realize. We’re just going to look at one word in that verse. Dictionary.com defines modest as “having or showing a moderate or humble estimate of one’s merits, importance, etc.; free from vanity, egotism, boastfulness, or great pretensions.”

Let’s take a closer look at that definition (click on the links to read the full definitions). As much as we may want to deny it, bikinis aren’t free from vanity, especially since most girls wear them to look good and show off their bodies, or to fit in. Wearing immodest clothing also demonstrates that we’ve chosen to not consider how much this makes guys struggle, which displays a bit of egotism. Wearing bikinis can be considered boastfulness, since we’re showing others that we are glorifying our own bodies by showing them off, and it is also pretentious, since we’re saying––either consciously or unconsciously––that we’re important enough that it doesn’t matter how our suit (or lack thereof) may make others feel.

If that’s not enough…

It would be completely inappropriate for a girl to walk around the mall wearing nothing but her underwear. She’d probably be escorted out by the mall police! Yet, that same girl could walk around outside, just a few miles away from the mall, wearing something that covers the same amount of skin that her underwear covers, and that’s socially acceptable because she’s at a swimming pool.

Think about this––if you were changing in your room and someone walked in on you while you were in your underwear, you’d probably be furious. But, that same person could see you at the pool wearing a suit that covers nothing more than the underwear you were seen in, and somehow that seems okay.

Socially, bikinis are acceptable, but spiritually, what’s the difference between strutting around in a bikini, and wearing underwear out in public? I’ve yet to find one!

If you’re struggling with the issue of wanting to wear a bikini (or any other immodest clothing) this summer, please pray about it and speak to a mature Christian woman who can guide you. You can be stylish while still looking like a Christian, and having someone to hold you accountable for your wardrobe may be just the nudge you need to dress in a way to glorify Christ (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Coming up

Later, we’re going to explore a great web-store that’s full of really cute and modest bathing suits! In the meantime, pray hard about your wardrobe, ask God to convict you of your sin, find a mentor if you need one, and begin thinking about the possibility of wearing a modest bathing suit this summer.

By Davonne Parks

Yesterday we talked about the importance of dressing modestly all the time, including formal occasions. Today we’re going to give a few shopping tips and offer suggestions about where to shop.

Shopping basics

Have a set budget in mind and stick to it. Maybe you found the perfect dress for your event – but it’s $300. Put it back! Look online to see if you can find a similar style (or even the same dress!) for a lower price. Look on eBay, do a google product search for the item number – do anything but plunk down $300 for a dress you’ll only wear once (1 Timothy 2:9). You can find a dress you love for a much, much lower price. Even if your parents are paying for your dress, respect their money and the fact that they work hard for it. Take the time to find a good deal on a dress you can feel good about purchasing.

Shop the clearance racks. Many brides are choosing the color of bridesmaids’ dresses and allowing the bridesmaids to choose their own flattering style. Take advantage of this! You may be able to score a great dress at a low price by looking through the clearance racks first.

Shop consignment stores. If your formal outfit is for anything other than a bridesmaid dress, you can shop second-hand shops to find a great deal on a dress that’s only been worn once or twice.

Be careful with the accessories. Whatever you save on the dress can easily be offset in the accessories. Use a little creativity. Shops that specialize in formal wear generally charge a lot of money for their shoes, jewelry, etc. Look at Payless or a department store clearance section. Better yet, swap with a friend, or purchase neutral shoes and jewelry that you will be able to wear for your next formal occasion.

Know the return policies. If you are unsure of a dress, don’t think that you can just return it if you change your mind. Many stores don’t allow returns on formal wear. The better option would be to ask an employee to hold an item for you, and come back after you’ve looked at your other options. Especially be aware of a return policy on online dresses. Generally, even if a company allows returns, you will still have to pay shipping to return the item, and that cost can add up.

Consider re-selling. Instead of letting your used dresses hang in a closet to never be worn again, think about selling them to a consignment store, or on ebay, to make some money back before the dresses go out of style. That money can be used to help cover the cost of a new dress, it can be placed in a college fund, or donated to a worthy cause.

Where to shop

David’s Bridal has a few modest formal wear choices. Again, once you’re in the store, make sure to check the clearance racks! I once scored a bridesmaid’s dress for $60, and the only alteration it needed was a little hemming (which a local seamstress did for a fraction of the David’s Bridal cost).

Beautifully Modest is full of great formal wear dresses! Modest By Design also has a great, modest selection, and they aren’t just limited to formal wear. Their selection includes several casual dresses, some of which are perfect for church, graduation, summer group dates, or attending weddings. Both of these stores are a little pricey, so keep that in mind, and check to see if there’s a store near you that may be running a sale.

You can also do a google search for modest formal dresses, search on ebay, or check your yellow pages for local formal wear consignment shops.

Remember

Above all, we should want to glorify God with our lives (1 Peter 4:16), and that includes what we wear. More than fitting in, more than wearing the style everyone else is wearing, and more than wanting to attract attention at the events we attend, we need to remember that we are Christians first. We can look pretty without compromising our values. Most importantly, we want people to remember us by our kind words and pure heart, not by what we wore to a formal occasion. This year, dress to impress – Christ that is!

By Davonne Parks

With warm weather approaching, many of us begin to think about formal wear. Whether we’re going to graduate, be a bridesmaid, or attend a formal event, we will probably want to purchase a new dress. Some of you may be planning on attending a school formal dance, but before you decide whether or not to do so, please read our article about dances.

Later we’ll talk about shopping basics, but today we’ll cover a few things about modesty (these also apply to normal clothes, not just formal wear).

God’s take on modesty

We are instructed in 1 Timothy 2:9 to dress modestly and discreetly. We’re told in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 that our bodies are a temple of the Holy Spirit, and that we are to glorify God with our bodies.

Exodus 20:14 and Matthew 5:27 tell us that committing adultery is a sin. Lust (an intense sexual desire toward someone we’re not married to) is also sinful. We know lust is a sin because we’re told in Matthew 5:28 that “everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Since adultery is a sin, and since, in God’s eyes, lust is equivalent to committing adultery, that means lust is also a sin.

I know that lust sounds like the guys’ problem, not ours, right? Well, 1 Corinthians 8 (especially verses 9 and 12) talks about how sinful it is to be a stumbling block to others. We’re told not to do anything that can cause someone else to sin. If wearing an immodest dress causes a guy to lust over us, then, yes, he is guilty of the sin of lust, but we’re also guilty of the sin of being a stumbling block. When we dress in enticing clothes, the lusting guys aren’t the only ones sinning. We’re also sinning by not dressing modestly (1 Timothy 2:9), and by being a stumbling block to the guys around us (1 Corinthians 8:9-12).

While it can be tempting to want to be the best (or least) dressed girl at an event in order to attract attention, it’s not worth it. Care enough about the souls of the guys there, and enough about your own soul, to find a dress that doesn’t tempt them to sin because of you. If you don’t care about their souls enough, pray for your own heart, and ask God to help you start to care. If you’ve sinned in this area in the past, make the decision to stop sinning, ask God for His forgiveness, and choose to begin wearing only modest clothes, including formal wear, from now on (1 John 1:9).

Now that your heart is (hopefully) open to modesty suggestions, read on!

Modesty basics

Avoid strapless. While a strapless dress might look pretty (although generally too revealing and suggestive) in the dressing room, spending hours at an event tugging on the neckline just isn’t attractive. Not tugging at the neckline could be worse though, which brings us to our next point.

Cleavage should never show. If the dress shows any cleavage whatsoever, even just when you bend down, find a different dress. Cleavage tempts guys to lust. There are thousands of great, stylish dresses that don’t show cleavage.

Skip dresses that accentuate the bust. Even if there’s no cleavage in sight, but the dress has beading, ribbon, or anything else that outlines the bust line, skip it, because that means your chest will be the first thing guys will notice, and not in a godly way.

Wear a bra. If the dress is too low, too strapless, too backless, or too anything else to wear a bra, then it’s too revealing. Period. Guys will definitely notice the lack of a bra, and this can be even more tempting than a little bit of cleavage showing.

Don’t wear a backless dress. Having a few criss-cross straps on the back of the dress doesn’t make it modest. The dress needs to have a real, solid back. This is a problem area for guys, too, especially if it’s the lower back, and we need to help them out!

Skin tight = too tight. While formal-wear dresses can fit in a flattering way, they should not look like they’ve been painted onto our skin. Find a dress that flows nicely away from the body once it reaches the hips to allow for more modesty and comfort.

To the knee is a must; below the knee is better. Short dresses are also tempting for guys, so the shortest part of the dress needs to be knee-length or longer. If you prefer a shorter formal-wear dress, opt for one that hits right below the knee so you’ll stay covered even if you’re moving around during your event (and especially if you’re a bridesmaid on some sort of platform).

If you know it’s immodest, don’t try it on. If you see a dress on the rack that’s just way too cute, but strapless, or backless, or low cut, or too short, or too something, put it back immediately. Don’t let yourself think about how great you’d look in it! If you try the dress on, you may be even more tempted to purchase it, so don’t allow yourself to do so. Put the dress back on the rack and move on to a more modest section.

Move around in the dressing room. Bend over in front of the mirror – if cleavage or underwear shows, try on a different dress. Twist your body, raise your arms––just move! If the dress doesn’t stay in place for the five minutes you have it on in the store, it’s not going to stay in place for the entire afternoon or evening you’re wearing it.

Coming up

Tomorrow we’ll discuss shopping basics, as well as include a few links to places that sell modest formal wear. For now, print this list of modesty basics, and share it with your mom (or whoever is going to take you dress shopping) so you can decide and agree upon modesty standards before hitting the stores.

By Davonne Parks

Autumn is a beautiful time of year. The trees look amazing with all their shades of oranges, reds, and yellows, and the weather feels wonderful. There’s a refreshing crisp, clean feel in the air.

Many people celebrate Halloween during this time of year and attend Halloween parties, but the Bible is very much against any type of witchcraft, which Halloween is often associated with. Read our October Friends article for more facts about Halloween.

Instead of celebrating the witches, goblins, and gore, why not celebrate the autumn season with a fall costume party? Bob for apples, roast marshmallows and hot dogs over a fire (use hay bales instead of chairs for seating), make caramel corn, and have good, clean autumn fun.

In previous Style Sense articles, we’ve discussed the importance of modesty, and as Christians and soldiers for Christ, we are to set an example and be the shining light for the world (Matt. 5:14). Autumn, and costume parties, are supposed to be fun, so make sure your modest costume reflects that. Use your imagination and be creative. Encourage your friends to dress modestly too. A good way to do that is to pick a theme for your group, such as a fruit basket or pigs in a blanket. If you are hosting the party, you can make the entire night a specific theme, such as influential people in history, favorite Bible characters, favorite (clean) movie characters, favorite candy bars, or anything else clean and fun you can think of.

Cheap and Easy Individual Costumes

1. 1950s Woman: Wear a tea length black dress with black pumps. Dress it up with pearl earrings, a necklace, and white elbow-length gloves. Use mega hold hairspray to style your hair into that classic 1950’s look. Add bright red lipstick and you’re ready to go!

2. Strawberry Shortcake: Wear blue pants and a blue skirt with a pink and white striped shirt. Borrow or buy a really big hat and tape cut-out strawberries onto it.

3. Princess: Wear an old formal or bridesmaid dress and heels and simply add a tiara.

4. Gymnast: Buy or borrow a leotard, throw gym pants over it, wear your hair pulled back into a scrunchie, and wear a medal around your neck.

5. Pippi Longstocking: Purchase a jumper from a thrift store, then hot glue square fabric remnants to the jumper. Put on a solid t-shirt under the jumper and wear mismatched knee socks. Shape a wire hanger to your head and braid your hair around it to make your braids stand out, then spray it orange with temporary spray die.

6. Ballerina: Wear a leotard with a knee-length tutu, ballerina slippers, and pink tights. Put glitter on your face and wear a tiara!

7. Bunch of Grapes: Wear black sweats as a base. Find a small remnant of green fabric and cut out leaves as you would with paper dolls. The leaves will come out in a long strand that will wrap around your neck. Then take a brown paper lunch bag and attach it to a party hat with staples. Twist the bag to make the stem. Use purple face paint to make your face a grape. Blow up about 20 purple balloons and attach them to the sweats with safety pins (through the lip of the balloon).

8. Raining Cats and Dogs: Sew stuffed dogs and cats onto an umbrella.

9. Black-Eyed Pea: Put black make-up around one or both eyes, and hot glue a letter “P” cut from felt to the front of your shirt.

10. Cowgirl: Put on jeans or a knee length denim skirt, boots, and a cowboy hat. Bonus if you use yarn and a marker to make a face on a paper bag and put the bag over the straw part of a broom for a horse.

11. Kindergarten girl: Wear jeans or capris with a pink shirt and pigtails. Put on a pink backpack or grab a pink lunch box and you’re ready to go!

Cheap and Easy Group Costumes:

1. The Seven Seas: Sew a length of sailing rope to the front of a blue shirt in the form of the letter C. Put on a sailors hat, and enlist six friends to do the same.

2. Pigs in a Blanket: Buy pig snouts from a costume store, and have everyone wrap themselves in a blanket.

3. Forest: Make costumes out of refrigerator boxes and washer boxes. Tall people can be different sized trees and shorter teens or younger siblings can be bushes. Paint the boxes to look like trees with holes cut out for the eyes. Supplies needed: cardboard boxes (trunk), paint (to paint the trunk and leaves), brown shirts, and crepe paper (leaves).

   Have a happy autumn, and feel free to e-mail us with pictures of your costume!

   By Alicia Sargent

How to Dress Modestly at School

“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; but (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.” 1 Timothy 2:9

These days provocative clothing is everywhere, on television, in shop windows, and everywhere on the street. Mini skirts and short shorts are the standard summer-wear, along with halter tops and spaghetti straps. Most girls wear such provocative clothing because they want to fit in or because they like the attention others give them. After all, they say, everyone else is dressing this way, so there’s nothing wrong with it. Right?

It’s hard for young girls not to fall into this trap. Abercrombie and Fitch boasts its “highest-quality, casual, all-American lifestyle clothing for aspiring men and women.” I want everyone to look closely at the following pictures from their website and ask yourself, what would people who wear these clothes be aspiring to be?

Now read the following Bible verse and see if any of these clothes are appropriate according to God. “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; but which becometh women professing godliness with good works” (1 Timothy 2: 9-10). Would you feel comfortable wearing these clothes in front of your minister? (Especially considering the first one is a dress!) What’s really sad is that all of these clothes are a very common sight anywhere you go. Even in school, girls are dressing more provocatively. How can we expect our young men to learn anything when girls wearing only two inches of material are constantly distracting them? Mini shirts and short shorts are everywhere, from popular teen stores at the mall to Wal-mart. If you refused to shop at any store that sold clothing like this, there would be nowhere left to shop! The key is to always keep in mind how God wants us to look. Christian girls can shop at most stores; we just can’t wear everything that store sells. American Eagle sells tiny shorts, but they also sell capris. The same holds true for almost any store. Just keep in mind that you have a choice in how you dress, and that what you wear reflects who you are and how people perceive you. The world judges us on how we appear, and so we are to be a light to the world, leading them to God. The problem is, how can we lead people to God when all they notice is the skin that should be covered up? We must consider God in everything we do, say, and wear. Everything reflects upon us, and when we tell people we are Christians, it reflects the congregation you attend and, most importantly, God himself. Keep this in mind the next time you’re talking to your friends. How do your friends really see you?

We all want to look cute that first day back to school; we just have to remember that we can look great and please God at the same time. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30). Remember that while what you wear may seem like a big deal today, life goes on, and in ten years you won’t even remember or care about what you wore in middle and high school. Your clothes make a statement about who you are, so let your statement be for God.

Let’s look at some cute—and modest!—clothes (and accessories) that are perfect for going back to school.

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Wal-mart Bermuda Shorts $14.72

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American Eagle Demin Capris $39.50

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American Eagle Empire Waist Dress $19.99

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Kohls $25.20 Tops $24.00

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JCPenney $39.99 Active Wear $19.99

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Payless $19.99 Shoes $11.99

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Old Navy $12.50 Bags $19.50

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By Alicia Marie Sargent